My first article for the Life Matters column, published in India Se magazine in April 2014.
LIFE MATTERS
A Life-Changing Choice
- by Pamposh Dhar
This
past week, as I followed the amazing story of a plane that appeared to have
vanished into thin air, I couldn’t help but think about the uncertainty of life
and how we take this essentially uncertain thing – our life – so much for
granted.
We
receive this life as a marvelous gift, yet we seldom stop to give thanks for
it. At the same time, we know we are here on this planet on borrowed time, yet
we act as if we will live forever.
Recently,
a friend of mine posted on Facebook that some of her “more evolved” friends
felt they should have a terminal illness to give them time to put their lives
in order before they die and, especially, to say their goodbyes. This really
surprised me – more so coming from apparently enlightened people.
No
doubt illness, like everything else in life, has much to teach us. Terminal
illness can certainly teach us acceptance and patience – if we are ready to
learn those lessons. But rather than wishing illness upon ourselves, would it
not be better to live every day knowing that this body that we live in is ours
not forever but only for this lifetime; knowing that this lifetime, in this
body, is finite? Not only that, but that this life is precarious – we have no
knowledge when precisely it will end.
Benjamin
Franklin famously quipped: “… in this world nothing can be said to be certain,
except death and taxes.” Leaving aside the joke about taxes, we know that if we
are born to this life we are certain one day to leave it too. We know also that
average life expectancy has nothing to do with our own individual life spans.
Lack of knowledge is not our problem – but lack of acceptance often is.
Acceptance
of these two key facts about life – and death – can completely transform the
way we live. This transformation came to me the hard way, with the sudden death
of someone very close to me at the young age of 20. A few days after that I
made a pact with my husband – we would never part, even for 10 minutes, on a
fight.
It
has been 13 years since we made that pact. For 13 years, it has held. Over the
years, I have silently extended this pact to all my relationships. I simply do
not part with anyone at all close to me on a sour note. We can agree to
disagree, we can agree to continue the argument later, but we say bye on
friendly terms.
This
is a simple principle that can change one’s life. I know, because it has
changed mine. It can change yours too. It can be extended also to leaving one’s
worldly affairs in reasonable order every day. Make that will today, move that
investment now, write that email, make that phone call – do what you want to do
and do it now.
No comments:
Post a Comment