LIFE MATTERS
Change is the Only Constant
Accepting change as a basic process of
life
-
by
Pamposh Dhar
The recent general
election in India brought amazing changes to the world’s second most populous
country – a huge mandate for a single party after decades of coalition
governments, a 129-year-old party associated with the freedom movement
virtually wiped out (at least for now) and no opposition worth the name.
Ironically I,
who teach people to “embrace change,” have been rather uncomfortable with these
changes. Yet – whether I like them or not – these changes are here. They have
happened and Indians of all political hues now have only two choices – to
accept that the changes have happened and move forward as best as possible; or
uselessly rail against the changes if they do not like them.
This is the
way change works. There is no way to avoid change, and the changes that affect
us do not always result from our own choices.
Anyone who has lost a loved one, been laid off work, or simply struggled
to deal with a computer virus, knows this.
There is no
life without change. We ourselves are always changing, from the moment we
arrive kicking and screaming into this world. All the people around us are
changing all the time, too. There may be a period in adulthood when physical
changes seem to slow down, but in fact they are still happening on the inside.
Almost all of our cells are replaced by new ones over a span of seven years –
so, in effect, each of us is a completely different person on the inside every
few years!
Our external world
is constantly changing as well and the pace of change has picked up
dramatically in our lifetimes, driven by rapid technological development and
globalization. Those of us who work outside the home need to adapt so often to
changing office environments that “change management” has now become a
legitimate subject of study and training in the corporate world. Those who stay
at home to bring up kids struggle just to keep abreast of the information,
images and ideas that the children are exposed to every day – not to mention
keeping up with the ways in which the kids access them.
So, if change
is inevitable, constant and often not to our liking, how best can we deal with
it? First of all, by accepting the reality of change and recognizing that we
cannot thrive in this world without it. Imagine if we never learnt anything new
after the age of 10, 20 or even 50! What a waste of opportunity to grow that
would be.
Acceptance
is, of course, easier if we like a specific change. But what about the “bad”
change, the kind we don’t like? Acceptance does not mean liking or approving of
something. It simply means acknowledging that it has happened, or is happening.
Just accept the fact.
With
acceptance of the facts comes clarity. You see what you can and cannot
influence, you spot opportunities even “bad” change might offer you. Based on
this understanding, you can choose a reasoned response to the situation. If
there is action to be taken, by all means take it. Just stop wasting your time
and energy ranting against that which you cannot change.
Acceptance
and clarity of vision bring the power to live happily in a constantly changing
world, making good choices and saving your energy for things that matter. This
includes choosing to make changes
that work well for you. When you remove your energy from “victim mode,” from
complaining about the things that “happen to you,” there is a better chance
that you will set your own goals and strategies to live the life you really
want.
Pamposh Dhar
is a counsellor, Reiki Master, and meditation and mindfulness teacher. Email pamposh@gmail.com or visit www.terataii.com.sg
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